Big news and Christmas time!
Christmas is fast approaching and, this year, I feel it more than ever.
I’ve always been one of those Christmas lovers who can’t wait to put up their tree and love spending time choosing and wrapping up gifts for friends and family. Still, this year is special for several reasons.
2019 has been the year when two of the most exciting events of my life took place:
- In September I published my first book, Secrets of a Handbag.
- In July, I discovered I was pregnant.
Oh, yes. You heard right. If everything goes as it should, my husband and I won’t be alone anymore sometime in March next year!
Since I work my day job in a chemistry laboratory, and it’s considered too risky during pregnancy, I have been home since July. That’s why I had time to think about Christmas since November. For once in my life, I had the time to decorate the house properly and fully enjoy the entire Christmas season.
I’m not sure this is going to happen again, so I’m definitely making the most of this time. I’ve tried really hard to refrain from decorating until December, at least, but the spirit of Christmas got the better of me and I started when it was still full November. On December 1st I put up our Christmas tree and now I already have several gifts wrapped up and ready to be delivered.
Becoming a parent and becoming a published author were two things I have been longing for some time. Obviously, they are entirely different — even if I consider Secrets of a Handbag my first kid — and completely different experiences. Still, they both have some things in common.
Both require a long gestation
Pregnancy is proving to be different from everything I ever experienced before. However, 40 weeks is a short time compared to the time it took me to write Secrets of a Handbag and make it ready for the world.
Six years. It took me six years from the moment I wrote the first paragraph to the moment I hit publish on KDP. 312 weeks.
But both having a baby and producing a book are processes that need their time to happen, and they’re not going to happen a moment sooner than they’re ready to.
Both cause me anxiety
Anxiety — or utter terror, if you prefer — is the reason it took me so long to publish Secrets of a Handbag. I was scared of the possible consequences, I was scared of the critics I might receive, I was scared to discover I’m a failure as a writer.
Anxiety is also the reason why I waited for six months before telling the world about my pregnancy. Sure, family and close friends already know, but what about the rest?
Why not share the joy a little earlier?
Because I was so scared something could go wrong and having people knowing about it made it even scarier.
I’m still scared, to tell you the truth. Being prepared for the worst possible outcome is part of my nature. However now my belly is proving difficult to hide, and I have to talk about it, that I like it or not!
Both take me to another step in life
After years of putting up with sympathetic looks from people who knew I was writing a book, I have something to prove that I am indeed a published author!
This may not make a big difference for my writing career, it certainly doesn’t make a difference in my bank account, but it surely does make a difference in my perception of who I am. Being able to tell the world, “Yes, I’m a f***ing published author,” is a huge step forward.
And for what concerns the other big news, I will have to take several steps to rearrange my life around a baby. But, honestly, I can’t wait!
So this Christmas I have many things to celebrate, many things to be grateful for, many expectations for the future, and one last chance to enjoy a Christmas tree without thinking who might decide to put decorations in his mouth.
Now tell me about you. Do you love Christmas? How are you going to decorate and celebrate? And don’t forget, if you need an idea for a Christmas present, a book is always a good one!