Facing the truth

Foto di Gerd Altmann da Pixabay

Wanting to be a writer is clearly not enough to become one. And inspiration alone will lead you to nowhere.

Being a writer requires a lot of hard work, commitment and sacrifice. It’s difficult, but not impossible. If you made choices that had nothing to do with writing in your life, it’s even more difficult.

Lately I’ve been reading a very good novel, written by a fellow Tribe Writer: Finding Eliza by Stephanie Pitcher Fishman. In this novel the main character finds out a family secret from an old diary.

This made me think at my diary and at the fact that I haven’t written an entry in more than a year, even if my life has been full of events. So I picked it up, shake off the dust and open it.

I’ve been a poor journal writer in the past few years, so much that this one is lasting from 2010. Opening at the first entries, I started reading here and there and realised a few things.

I’ve been writing about writing for a long time, but my entries were always vague and full of wishes without any real purpose or plan. I admitted to myself that what I want to be in life is a writer only in the past two years.

I already knew, but I was to afraid to say it out loud, let alone pursue my dream. That’s why I made the choice to study something that would have granted me a job, something I liked but wasn’t my true passion. And now I feel like I’ve been only deflected from what I should have done from the beginning.

I like my job but it’s not my dream, and most of the times it feels like it’s distracting me from writing. The best parts of my day are the mornings, before I go to work when I take time to translate or read, my lunch breaks when I mange to write a few hundreds words, and the evenings when I’m at home and I can write and translate at leisure (when I’m not too tired).

Sounds familiar?

Have you ever felt like that?

I constantly feel like that, but I’m trying to figure out a way to change things in due time. At present I can’t quit my job to be a full time writer, I need it to earn money to live, and I fear it will be a long time before I could do something like that.

But there are other things I can do.

First of all: I need to prove to myself (again and again) that I can be a writer by seriously committing my time to that. I’m already doing that somehow, but I need to better use the time I have for writing.

Second: I have a full novel already written. Then what’s the problem, you may ask. The problem is that writing it was the easy part. Now I have to decide what to do. I can’t put it off any longer. I need to send my work out in the world one way or another. That’s why I need to finish the last revision as soon as possible and then decide if trying the traditional route or going for self publishing. I’m bound to make mistakes, but I’ll learn from them for the next time.

One step at a time I want and I will get closer to my dream job.

10 Replies to “Facing the truth”

  1. Joan

    Great post, Irene, and I need to read this today. Just a few days ago, I read my own manifesto and was struck by my words, “The writing journey doesn’t end with the completion of an article or manuscript….” So now, I need to edit my manuscript…and keep writing.

  2. tuleshwari

    hey,my life story is little bit like you only. I’m studying engineering while my passion is about music. I was really loosing hope for my music carrier…this is really good that you ain’t let go of with your writing. I got little cheer up by your story 🙂

    • Irene Aprile

      Often pursue a career in an “artistic field” is seen like a sort of waste of time. One is lead to believe that the most important thing is making a living out of a job (and that’s important fir sure) but it’s not all. The quality of ones life is as important as money. I’m sure that if your passion is strong enough you can do both!

  3. Michele Jones

    I too have a day job. That makes it difficult to write, but not impossible just as you have said. Your post makes us realize that we can pursue our passion while holding down a day job until we can become full time writers. Thanks for sharing.

  4. Enzo

    Tu leggeresti le mie picccole verità? E voi che leggete qui fareste altrettanto? Scrivo solo in Italiano mi dispiace ma esistono i traduttori ed io amo molto la mia lingua.

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